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You’ve likely heard it preached from every business blog, career coach, and influencer under the sun:

“Find yourself a mentor.”

Of course, a mentor can be helpful. That’s undeniable. But is “finding” one the way you should go about it?

And, if so, how are you supposed to find one?

Where does one find a good mentor? 😩— Reyna Noriega (@reynasnoriega) November 17, 2018

Back in the early days of my career, fresh-faced and eager, I chased mentors. I believed that, if I could only meet the right person, I’d be set.

But what I ended up with was a collection of forced relationships, where I was always the taker and they, the giver. It was, at best, an uncomfortable dynamic, and at worst, an unhelpful one.

I began to question the whole process. Is this how I should be doing it?

Stop Searching and Start Attracting

Here’s a different take: Stop searching for a mentor.

Rather than frantically seeking out someone to guide us, why don’t you become the sort of individual that others are eager to invest their time in?

Instead of waiting for someone to shape and mold you, start actively driving your own development.

It’s about creating value not only for ourselves but also for those around us. It’s about stepping out of our comfort zones, embracing challenges, and taking ownership of our journey.

That’s when mentors are more likely to take notice.

Stop searching for a mentor.Instead, attract a high-quality mentor by making yourself someone worth spending time on.— Justin Welsh (@thejustinwelsh) October 15, 2023

The business world is not a classroom, where we sit passively, receiving lessons from an all-knowing mentor. It’s an interactive field where we learn by doing, failing, adapting, and succeeding.

The moment I stopped chasing mentors and started focusing on becoming someone worth mentoring, my perspective shifted.

I built businesses, made hard decisions, experienced failures, and celebrated victories. I became immersed in the very core of business: action.

And a funny thing happened along the way: I started to attract mentors.

How to Get the Ball Rolling

Mentors are naturally excited by ambition, drive, and a willingness to get your hands dirty.

They want to work with someone that they could exchange ideas with. Someone they can learn from, as much as teach. A 2-way street.

I’m not saying mentors aren’t valuable. They 100% are.

What I am saying is that the relentless pursuit of finding a mentor can lead us to overlook the importance of making ourselves individuals worth mentoring.

So, why not make yourself an irresistible magnet for mentorship, instead of desperately seeking it?

The best way to get a mentor is be worth mentoring.No one's gonna hold your hand and walk you outta mediocrity.Go do something. Make some mistakes. Get a body of work, even if it's a shoddy.Look like you're trying and not just after a handout or a hook-up.— Ed Latimore (@EdLatimore) April 12, 2020

Take a step back from the search, roll up your sleeves, and dive into the thick of things. Create content on platforms like LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram or YouTube.

Build, innovate, and take risks. Be so interesting that mentors come seeking you, rather than the other way around.

What if the real growth, the real learning, the real success, is in the doing and becoming, rather than in the seeking and following?

It’s an alternative approach, sure.

But it’s one I believe holds a wealth of untapped potential.

What about you?

Cheers,

Justin Welsh

Want short ideas on living and working on your own terms? Follow me on LinkedIn, X/Twitter, and Instagram.

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